Thursday, October 11, 2012

From now on, I'm in there!

I read an article last week that made made an impact like nothing has in a long while. I'm sure many of you have seen it being shared around Facebook. It's an entry at The Huffington Post by freelance writer Allison Tate called 'The Mom Stays in the Picture.' Allison writes about being at a family event where her son begged her to take photos with him in the photo booth. She didn't want to because she was not at her best, still holding on to some baby weight. Not dressed in her cute clothes. She goes on to talk about how so many moms avoid being in photos preferring to take them instead. She makes a case on why we should be getting in the pictures because our kids will value those pictures when we're old and gone. This is a crude summary and doesn't do her beautiful words justice but you get the gist. Her account is moving and had me in some serious tears reading it. If you haven't already, take a few minutes and read it yourself.

I really connected with her message because I am one of those woman who have very few pictures with the kids. Look back at this blog. It's not very often you see pictures of me, especially in the last year or so. When I do ask someone else to take the camera for a change I end up deleting their efforts 99% of the time. I just can't stand the sight of myself,  I couldn't care less about whether I'm wearing cute clothes, or if my hair is done. For me it's all about the weight. I've talked about it before when things were going well. I've posted about my good intentions earlier this year. Unfortunately, that and a couple other well meaning tries have ended in miserable defeat and a few more pounds. I just can't seem to get myself together and photos just show me how far away I've ended up from where I want to be. Reading Allison's words makes me realise that I'm being very selfish. Like she says, the kids don't look at me and see me as their FAT mommy, I'm just Mommy. The woman who snuggles them at bedtime. The woman who dances with them anywhere they feel like dancing. The woman who loves them for just who they are. So maybe I should give myself the same courtesy.  Not that being overweight  obese is a good choice, and I still want to fix that one big negative in my life but in the meantime this mom is going to get in the picture and stay there. I don't care how fat I think I look, how many chins you can see. I'm going to be in that picture.

In honor of Allison and my kids, I created my own photo booth like shoot. We had fun and I got some good shots. And I don't hate any of them. I look happy. My kids are smiling. That's what I want them to see when they look back when I'm gone.


Sunday, October 7, 2012

Happy Thanksgiving

O learned this song at preschool this past week and I've been bugging him to sing it to me over and over. What makes me happiest is that he seems to find it impossible to sing it with out doing the silly dance. How his dancing makes me smile!

Sorry for the terrible quality.  I took this with my phone which apparently takes bad video.